Insane

The hubs says that I should get my thoughts out when I am really stressed, so that’s what I am going to try here. Well, let’s start with I am driving myself nuts. You might wonder what could possibly be bothering me. Well, my whole body hurts. And it hurts in an achy sort of way, where my muscles hurt when I move. When I lie still on the couch, it doesn’t really hurt much. So I have convinced myself that I have Lyme’s Disease. Okay, why the leap? We were hiking a bit on our weekend away and since it’s the time of year for baby deer ticks to be out, I figured I got one on me and didn’t find it even though we are vigilant about out tick checks. If I had Lyme’s wouldn’t I have other symptoms? Maybe, maybe not. It is one of those vague diseases where you could end up with some symptoms and not others, so I’m pretty sure that is the case. Could my soreness be linked to anything else? YES! Like STRESS!!!! Okay so when I get stressed out enough, occasionally, my whole body will hurt. It seems to start in my back, but it ventures out into other areas of my body. Is it possible that this is what is happening right now? Yes. I think that it is. Particularly since the achy-ness  does not seem to have a rhyme or reason. It just hurts at random. I am concerned because my hands and feet hurt, but why can’t that be stress too? Or why can’t it be from sleeping very poorly last night? I think I managed a whole 6 hours of sleep, which is not enough. Which could explain some of the insanity. It’s harder to fight these feelings when I am tired. They seem to just overtake me and not leave me alone. And what do I have to be stressed about? I’m not really sure anymore. They voted. My job is safe for one more year. I am finished with the interviews, and I think I might decline others if I am fortunate enough to get any more. Healthwise, I actually seem fine, except for this horrible achy-ness. I just don’t know what to do. Actually, what I will most likely do is just try to sleep tonight and see how I feel tomorrow after a good night’s sleep. If I feel worse tomorrow, I will head off to the doctor to request a test. If I feel better, I will let it go because I can’t imagine that it is something that comes and goes. Besides, I only seem to have one symptom and if I lie still enough it doesn’t even bother me. Here’s to maybe relaxing a little bit and convincing the hubs that I really need a back rub because I was good and posted my feelings. 🙂

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